I have a simple thought: Everyone needs good friends. Good friends are reflection of our gifts and flaws and they are with us throughout every season of our lives.
I knew my best friends for about 15 years now. We went through school together and even though we live on different sides of the world now, we genuinely take interest in one another’s lives, knowing that we are always there for one another. It always puts a smile on my face to know that I have them when I return home for a visit.
There is another group of girls which by the grace, favour and right timing from my beloved Daddy God that we are just like sisters. We met up few weeks ago and it was the best way to wrap up my week. We rambled about our weeks, encourage one another about the individual struggles, and finally even took the time to list the gifts we possess - not to forget the laughter we had during the session.
I believe as Ecclesiastes chapter 10 verse 9 and 10 say, “Two are better than one, because they have a good return for their labour. If either of them falls down, one can help the other up. But pity anyone who falls and has no one to help them up.” It always warms my heart to meet them and be refreshed and nourished after every meetup.
I also like to acknowledge that I have a great guy friend for about 7 years now. Without him, I might not have learnt about how a guy thinks, let alone understanding my husband who is a complete opposite of me. When there were fights with my then-boyfriend, I would go to this trusted brother to find out if I overreacted or if he was really at fault.
As iron sharpens iron, so man sharpens one another. He had sharpened me over the years to be more sensitive to how my husband would feel, and taught me to be less reactive when it was seemingly a fault from my perspective but it was how a guy would genuinely behave and I just needed to have more patience and communication.
Personally I am very blessed with many good friends. As Luke chapter 6 verse 3 writes, “Do to others as you would have them do to you.” While I receive the blessings from God, I want to be a good friend to others as well. Hence, I would pray to use my time wisely to invest into different individuals.
In saying that, because I love my friends, and hence I want to be used as a vessel to influence my friends around me to know who our Heavenly Father is through me in every way possible.
“Walk with the wise and become wise, for a companion of fools suffers harm.” When friends of different personalities and life experiences surround me, I experience a different side of God from each individual. I discover their gifts and how God uses them to make my friends shine. As I go through difficulties, individual friends are able to provide unique advice and perspectives to speak into the situations.
I am constantly humbled by the love and mercy of God to bring me friends whom I treasure, no matter how far apart we are. I am blown away by how much mercy and grace they shower upon me despite my flaws. I truly believe that God brings to everyone people who will walk with them through every season.
So here are some tips to make good friends:
Firstly, we will need to invest time into the people that we could be good friends with. There is no formula here, but I believe in Qarah, a Hebrew word that explains being at the right place at the right time. God will put the right people in our lives at the right place at the right time. When we trust Him to bring people into our lives, He would certainly do it. The people around us did not appear by chance, they are carefully selected by God to be in our worlds to be of the right influence and help to us.
Secondly, we should be selective with who can be in our inner circle. Personally I believe everyone can be our friend, but we should pray for wisdom for the right friends to be part of our inner circle. They are ones whom we can safely trust and share our hearts with. Perhaps it is not hard to know who can be close friends - perhaps the ones we knew for a short period of time, and yet we get along like we have known for ages are a good sign that they could be our close friends.
In conclusion, friends are a vital part of our journey in life. We should definitely spend the time, effort, wisdom and prayers to find them as they are worth it.
Amy Ching is a Press Service International young writer from Auckland NZ