Have you ever asked yourself if God is still faithful and trustworthy when things seem to go exactly opposite to the way you intended? Did you get upset and ask God why the miracle you thought you had to have was now a disaster you desperately wanted to get out of?
You have no idea how situations can turn from good to horrible overnight. You question your worthiness and purpose and yet you hear nothing from God. You try to find your answers yet you do not even know what to ask.
Two weeks ago, I found out that my job is proposed to be made redundant. I had a week to decide if I wanted to leave or try to apply for two other positions. I knew it would be impossible for my applications to succeed. I asked God, How did this even happen? He blessed me with this role just before I moved to Auckland. Now 15 months later, I faced a situation that I repeatedly asked if I had made into a disaster. I questioned why redundancy would fall upon me and what I had done wrong. How did what God had initially blessed me with now become a heartache for me?
I knew the answer was to leave, but I struggled with the fact that I had to pretend nothing happened in front of family and colleagues before I formally made my decision known. I always thought this role was a stepping stone for me to accomplish my goal of becoming a project manager. However, it now felt like a tripping stone for my faith journey.
I doubted my ability in the workforce; I wanted to quit working altogether. If my current workplace decided that my skills were not up to standard, why would any other place think I am worthy to make a difference? Despite these questions, I decided to go with the inner peace to leave the position, and did my best to give as much feedback as I could.
In order not to be caught in a downward emotional spiral afterwards, I spent two weeks listening to sermons, mainly Pastor Joel Osteen as he is a very encouraging preacher. His sermons assured me that a small setback does not prevent God from leading me where He wants me to go. I spent most of my nights praying and having conversations with God, asking Him to heal my emotions and assure me that I am still qualified to do great things for Him.
Through these few weeks, God really showed Himself to me. He showed me that even when my world falls apart, He is the constant in my life which will never change. He taught me how to change my perspective to deal with situations going the opposite way I wanted. He has me in the palm of His hands.
I know there is a purpose for this challenge and Daddy God definitely will not mismanage my life. I just have to remember what Psalm 119, verse 105 says, “Your word is a lamp to my feet and light unto my path.” He will guide my every step and I am even closer to my breakthrough than I think. I need to learn what Proverbs chapter 3, verse 5 tells me, “Trust in the Lord with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding.” I know that He will use this time of discomfort to thrust me into my destiny.
This difficulty may have interrupted my life and I still do not know why it has happened, but it has not interrupted my destiny. All I need to do is to be still, and know God is still on the throne. The God who has never failed me before, the God who will never fail me ever.
Amy Ching enjoys fellowship with people and seeing their lives changed because of Jesus. Her passion is to influence others and speak into their lives. She loves watching dramas, drinking bubble tea, especially matcha flavoured ones, and spending time with kids. If you want to know more about her, check out her instagram account @chingamy, where she posts about life, her revelations, and hopes to inspire.
Amy Ching’s previous articles may be viewed at http://www.pressserviceinternational.org/amy-ching.html