First published February 17, 2013
There is something about the New Year's Resolution that is fundamentally annoying to me. It might be the enforcement of the unrelenting pressure to be better that I am reacting to or it could be the over familiar and inauthentic nature in which such resolutions are made… After a few too many bevvies and an inspirational sing of Auld Agnes Syne, I'm anyone's project!
But with all singing aside, for whatever reason, I don't like them. And as we fast approach March, I am reminded all the more of the ways in which I fail by my own hand. So, at the risk of sounding like the Grinch who stole goal setting, I think we should scrap the New Year's Resolution and resolve ourselves to reflect more and resolve less.
Resolving to not resolve
I am a firm believer that in glancing back once in a while, the path ahead is illuminated by the reflection of our insights. It has been this easy all along! We don't need to perform our way to perfection in order to improve, just ponder the abysmal efforts of our past.
What a relief!
And so to shed a little light, this is what 2013 has taught me…
I have learnt that
• You cannot control life and live in grace at the same time, one cancels out the other. I have learnt that
• Love is a risk because people are messy and that timing is vital.
I have learnt that
• You should always make sure you have correctly sealed the dumpling skin before you proceed to boil it.
• I have learnt that I always have a choice to respond in a dignified and loving manner but that sometimes, there is nothing better than a good swear word.
I have learnt that
• It is possible to suffer and still find joy in the midst of it, that life is always more meaningful when you share yourself with others, and that sometimes, the people you love, can betray and you'd have to live with it…and love them anyway.
That was a harder lesson.
I have learnt that
• Life comes with death and that if I am going to live well, comfortable in my skin, I have got to be prepared to take the sorrow with the joy, it is part of the gift.
• That some things are worth revisiting and some are not, that I like routine even though I pretend to be a free spirit who doesn't wear shoes. I have learnt that shellac nail polish is great and that my sister is both an extension of who I am and my polar opposite and that that is okay, there is room for us both.
I have learnt that
• Perseverance is underrated, that most feelings are inaccurate indicators of reality, and that we find truth when we are willing to journey our own toxicity but that some people won't.
And maybe the most important of all,
I have learnt that
• You can't truly and unconditionally accept someone until you accept yourself.
And in the light of such knowledge, I look forward to all of the musings and mistakes 2014 has in store.
Gemma Taylor despite constant scorn and painful jokes is proudly from the Waikato; although she is presently living in Auckland with her fingers in many pies. She is inspired by truth, creativity and connection. Gemma writes for buoyancy and hopes to one day live wholly by the ideas that she writes of.
Gemma Taylor previous articles may be viewed at www.pressserviceinternational.org/gemma-taylor.html